Monthly Archives: December 2010

Worthy Cause – Your Health

Going a different direction with my Worthy Cause today.

We often neglect our own health for a variety of reasons.  I’m not St. Richie on this I’m just as sinful as the rest of y’all… yes I said y’all… well typed it rather fuck it.. I said it too but you can’ hear it because well it’s int he past and I don’t have a mic handy and it really doesn’t matter a rat’s ass… Back on the path…. ANYWAYS… Especially this time of year for the parts of the world that are all wintry blustery and frigid we do stupid things and get sick.  For most of us it isn’t a big deal, especially those of us with germ farms.. I mean to say those of us blessed enough to be parents.


If anyone has been paying attention , and if you haven’t I don’t blame you I’ve been a bit quiet of late,  my ma has been ill – She’s been on a ton of steroids that weaken her immune system and she gets ill at the drop of a hat now, there are a multitude of immune deficiencies out there for you to get hit with.  You bring a cold virus within a mile of someone suffering from one you’ve knocked them on their ass for a month or more.   Get something a  little stronger like influenza you can damn near kill them.  Take time and be healthy before you walk out that door, wash hands, cough/sneeze into your elbow (Dracula Sneeze), Care enough not to share at least as far as germs go.  Even if you don’t have someone in your life that isn’t dealing with a  compromised immune system passing less illnesses around the house results in happier less whiny kids, cuts down on the having to buy theraflu and decongestant tabs by the case load, and generally just makes us happier peoples.

I’m trying to ease slowly back into updates for random pimpage… bear with me while I try to recapture my stride.


Turning the Clock Back

It’s that season once again… no not Christmas this hasn’t been Christmas for way to freaking long it’s BUYMECRAPMAS!!!!!

In the Spirit of BuymeCrapmas I’ve written a little caroal – still a WIP but her it is so far – Buy Me Crap – (to the tune of let it snow)

Buy Me Crap

Oh the children’s faces are Frightful
Buy the wrong toys they’ll be spitefull
No time to give presents a Wrap
Buy me Crap! Buy me Crap! Buy me Crap!

Tis the season for shopping
This damn list will keep he hopping
No time to take a nap
Buy me Crap! Buy me Crap! Buy me Crap!

When we finally finish the lists
How I’ll hate to see the Credit Card Bill
Money will really be tight
Next year I’ll be paying Still

My funds are quickly dying
And the brats are still freaking Buying
I’m about ready to snap
Buy me Crap! Buy me Crap! Buy me Crap!


I understand some of you are Atheists, or Jewish, or Satanists or (insert belief or lack thereof system here) but I dont’ piss on your holidays please don’t piss on mine.

For the rest of us that actually celebrate Christmas – let us please try to get our holiday back on track – I’m not saying to not buy your kids or (insert gift recipient here) but can we make sure to make the holiday into more than just the presents.  Remind our kids what the season is about, what it meant, what it is supposed to still mean.  This time of year is not just about the birth of our savior but also about rebirth, the days start getting longer, the rebirth of the light, love for our fellow man no matter what the fuck they believe.  Lets take the holiday back from the stores and put it back in our hearts where it belongs….  I’m getting off my soapbox now.

and I hope you have a lousy buymecrapmas but a wonderful Christmas, and if you don’t celebrate Christmas I still wish you a wonderful one on top of whatever you do celebrate this time of year unless of course it is buymecrapmas…

State of the Dork Address

Hey Folx it’s your favorite slackass… That’d be me if i’m not your favorite slackass… well I’ll go cry in my beer later.

Gearing up to Try to get back into the pimpage again, yeah you’ve heard it before and likely will hear it again… hopefully not for a while and hopefully I’ll get back in the swing of things soon.

Ma isn’t doing well, so my head is not in a  good space right now she’s not eating which means she’s getting weaker her immune system is still tanked her medsd aren’t doing a fucking thing yet the doctors still insist she purchase them (If I find out that any of her docs are getting kickbacks on those useless drugs they refuse to take her off of even though they aren’t having any effect I’ll make sure they never practice medicine again if I have to chew their freaking fingers off to do so) She goes in Friday for a pic line (feeding line) so they can get nourishment in her and maybe some antibiotics – If her cardiologist signs off on it she goes in to have about 75% of her colon removed and the rest resectioned on the 8th.  My Ma’s health has been part of the family drama that has had me on the sidelines most of the year between that and issues with my 18 year old it’s been a dramatic year… have I mentioned I hate Drama.

Things are starting to wind down I hope to start making semi regular posts this month but we all know how many times I’ve said that in the past.

If you could spare a moment and send some positive thoughts or prayers or white light ( or whatever your belief or lack thereof system uses) my ma’s way I appreciate it greatly.  Her name is Shirley Asplund.  She’s the toughest person I know and she’s in the most agony I’ve ever seen her.

At this stage I wish her peace and to be free of pain… Whether in life or death, I just want her suffering to end, you bet your ass I’d prefer in life if I can have it, but I’m not that selfish of a prick to demand my mother live in agony just because I can’t let go.