Category Archives: Updates


Like a zombie, RP is rising from the dead… Hopefully like a zombie and not a Final Destination or Saw Sequel.


Things are getting tweaked poked and prodded into shape.

My reviews will stand as I personally see things now and if it’s something I’ve reviewed in the past I’ll repost it from the vaults to show how time might have changed my views.

I’ve missed doing Random Pimpage.  I’ve missed having time to enjoy fiction in both dead tree, electronic and audio format.


So where the hell have I been.  Working – A lot, when I have my OT days I still have a 3 hour commute one way, when I get out on time my commute is shortened by an hour and as my health has been less then great recently I’ve been sleeping on the commute (train and bus not driving) and therefore have not been consuming creative content as I once was.  I’m not as bad off as I was so I’m starting to consume podcasts and print books again.  Which means my opinionated ass has something to say once again.  Some of the content I may be reviewing for a second time as I give a listen again to some old favorites and I’ll provide my view as I consume it now with a view of how I felt when I first partook of it’s splendor.


I’ll be resurrecting 8 questions if I have any creators out there that are willing to put up with them.  You should be seeing more of me in the coming week.

take it light and see you on the other side.


State of the Blog 1-27-2011

Well folks I promised the first new review of the year would go to Nathan Lowell and Owner’s share and that is indeed the plan it will be coming up next.  But I’d like to first make an announcement so this makes it a double post day.

2010 is what a sports team would call a restructuring year.  Which means that my head was so far up my ass paying attention to way too many things and I dropped the ball a lot.  I call it life kicking me in the nards and me whining too much to do any good.  Now I feel my head is mostly extracted from my ass which is a good thing because the view back there was shitty (yes groan all you want bad puns are my forte and I’m getting the worst ones out of my system now).  I’m working on getting back on schedule.  That means I’ll be starting up 8 Questions, and Worthy Causes again as well as working on evolving Random Pimpage here a little as well.  I have a new email address setup for the blog  If you have any requests for a Cause to be mentioned, Media or Creator review (I don’t just do Podcasts I’ll take a look at any media I can afford to and I’ll actually review / critique creators as well) or if you have in mind a  Victim.. er Subject for 8 Questions or just something you want me to pimp you can just drop me a line at with Request <Segment Name> in the subject line and tell me who / what in the body and I’ll take it under advisement.

Warning – the stuff I review on my own I do because I love the material and that shows by the fact that anything I do on my own is usually a review in a good light.  At least on something I listened to my ma when she said “If you can’t say anything nice just shut the fuck up.”  (verbatim quote)  BUT I’ll take a look at anything anyone wants me too but I will be honest.  You ask my opinion I’ll give you my honest unvarnished opinion.  And lastly I will only pimp projects that I feel are deserving of it if I don’t think it’s worthy, I will not pimp it.

In the mean time until I’m back up to speed again I’ll be mixing in some older posts brought from the vaults with newer content – The older stuff will be titled From the Vaults, newer stuff will just have a normal title.

Welcome to 2011

Greetings and hallucination my dear friends fiends, followers and stalkers.

Okay no stalkers yet but a boy can dream can’t he?!

Welcome to 2011.  It’s a great new year, I feel good, the drama seems to be past for now though I think I just shot myself in the foot by drawing attention to it.  But as I came to look at it last week.  World bring it, go ahead get your steel toes on for the nut-kicking you’re about to deliver to me.  I’m ready to come over the counter and slap the bitch out of you.

Random Pimpage is back on track.

Posts should start popping up this week.

For those of you still paying attention to the site thank you to those that forgot all about me and aren’t bothering to check back…. Fair enough but I still say thpppppppppppppppppppppppppt.

Turning the Clock Back

It’s that season once again… no not Christmas this hasn’t been Christmas for way to freaking long it’s BUYMECRAPMAS!!!!!

In the Spirit of BuymeCrapmas I’ve written a little caroal – still a WIP but her it is so far – Buy Me Crap – (to the tune of let it snow)

Buy Me Crap

Oh the children’s faces are Frightful
Buy the wrong toys they’ll be spitefull
No time to give presents a Wrap
Buy me Crap! Buy me Crap! Buy me Crap!

Tis the season for shopping
This damn list will keep he hopping
No time to take a nap
Buy me Crap! Buy me Crap! Buy me Crap!

When we finally finish the lists
How I’ll hate to see the Credit Card Bill
Money will really be tight
Next year I’ll be paying Still

My funds are quickly dying
And the brats are still freaking Buying
I’m about ready to snap
Buy me Crap! Buy me Crap! Buy me Crap!


I understand some of you are Atheists, or Jewish, or Satanists or (insert belief or lack thereof system here) but I dont’ piss on your holidays please don’t piss on mine.

For the rest of us that actually celebrate Christmas – let us please try to get our holiday back on track – I’m not saying to not buy your kids or (insert gift recipient here) but can we make sure to make the holiday into more than just the presents.  Remind our kids what the season is about, what it meant, what it is supposed to still mean.  This time of year is not just about the birth of our savior but also about rebirth, the days start getting longer, the rebirth of the light, love for our fellow man no matter what the fuck they believe.  Lets take the holiday back from the stores and put it back in our hearts where it belongs….  I’m getting off my soapbox now.

and I hope you have a lousy buymecrapmas but a wonderful Christmas, and if you don’t celebrate Christmas I still wish you a wonderful one on top of whatever you do celebrate this time of year unless of course it is buymecrapmas…

State of the Dork Address

Hey Folx it’s your favorite slackass… That’d be me if i’m not your favorite slackass… well I’ll go cry in my beer later.

Gearing up to Try to get back into the pimpage again, yeah you’ve heard it before and likely will hear it again… hopefully not for a while and hopefully I’ll get back in the swing of things soon.

Ma isn’t doing well, so my head is not in a  good space right now she’s not eating which means she’s getting weaker her immune system is still tanked her medsd aren’t doing a fucking thing yet the doctors still insist she purchase them (If I find out that any of her docs are getting kickbacks on those useless drugs they refuse to take her off of even though they aren’t having any effect I’ll make sure they never practice medicine again if I have to chew their freaking fingers off to do so) She goes in Friday for a pic line (feeding line) so they can get nourishment in her and maybe some antibiotics – If her cardiologist signs off on it she goes in to have about 75% of her colon removed and the rest resectioned on the 8th.  My Ma’s health has been part of the family drama that has had me on the sidelines most of the year between that and issues with my 18 year old it’s been a dramatic year… have I mentioned I hate Drama.

Things are starting to wind down I hope to start making semi regular posts this month but we all know how many times I’ve said that in the past.

If you could spare a moment and send some positive thoughts or prayers or white light ( or whatever your belief or lack thereof system uses) my ma’s way I appreciate it greatly.  Her name is Shirley Asplund.  She’s the toughest person I know and she’s in the most agony I’ve ever seen her.

At this stage I wish her peace and to be free of pain… Whether in life or death, I just want her suffering to end, you bet your ass I’d prefer in life if I can have it, but I’m not that selfish of a prick to demand my mother live in agony just because I can’t let go.

Not an Excuse – An Explanation and an apology.

Yeah I was supposed to come back strong this summer and get my chubby ass back on track and it didn’t happen.  Without going into details, Life got in the way I had decisions to make between writing and crits vs life drama, and sadly drama won.  Some of it was important, some of it was crap that I should have just brushed aside and gotten back to work but at that point I was so thoroughly out of the habit that it was far easier to just flop on the couch and daze than think.

For that I apologize.  I get distracted very easy, and if I’ve been away from things too long drop me a line and bust my chops about when the next post / review / pimpage is coming out.

I do plan on getting back on track both with Pimpage, and my Accountability.  Summer kinda sucked my will to be responsible this year and that’s not an acceptable excuse, I’m sorry that I let laziness creep in and hold sway this summer all I can say is I will do my best to keep up  with my responsibilities that I undertook of my own free will.  Nobody made me start a blog but I really do need to keep up with it.

Harrass me at @RAsplundJr on twitter or here on the blog when I start slacking.

So What Have You Done Lately??

What have you done lately to help you favorite creative content producers??

Have you given them feedback?  Have you purchased any of their works that are available for purchase?  Noticed any glaring errors that you think they need to address?  Have you even stopped for a second and dropped them a quick “Thanks”?

People who are established in the paid markets like Stephen King have a way of tracking their success it’s called a royalty check.  Many of our favorite content providers here in the podioshpere aren’t to that level yet.  They need us to show them support so that someday they can grow to be the giants in the field.  I think it’s author / podcaster John Mireau (@johnmierau on twitter and the Podiobook Serving Worlds) that recently gave the call to action to send a content provider 1 Praise, and 1 Constructive comment.  That’s one thing that I have been striving for since launching random Pimpage.  Past few months I’ve failed but I’ve been taking care of things behind the scenes, and trying to get my head back into a positive headspace instead of the  downward plummet I had been in for a while. (Lots of personal crap that would prolly bore you to tears so I won’t bother to digress into it.)  Here’s the deal.  Find people that you value their content and give back.  Be it a couple bucks on a donate button, or a couple of notes on what you like and what doesn’t work for you on their content.  Just be aware that you can tell them what they should do all day long, but in the end they get to select which votes to count as it is their content so don’t get all pissed off because they “ignored” your immensely inspired and ultimately perfect logic on how they should proceed.  You gotta be you they gotta be themselves too.

I would like to take a moment and thank some truly great people in the community that have inspired me to do more than just sit on my copious ass on the sidelines and participate.

Tee Morris @TeeMonster

Pip Ballantine @PhilippaJane

Scott Sigler @ScottSigler

Mur Lafferty @MightyMur

P.G. Holyfield @PGHolyfield

J.C. Hutchins @JCHutchins

Justin Macumber @JustinMacumber

Terry Mixon @TerryMixon

Ryan Stevenson @RyanEStevenson

Starla Huchton @RiznPhnx

Nathan Lowell @NLowell

Odin @Odin1Eye

Kaye @KMLaw

These are great people that you should check out on Twitter.  Great Authors and Story Tellers, great people to interact with, and fun loving smartasses to boot.  There are many more people that deserve to be on this list but Lunch only lasts for so long before I have to get back to fixing people’s computer issues.

But before I go there is one more person that deserves special thanks and praise… and not just because she lets me sleep with her but that is a nice bonus.  My wonderful supportive HOTTIE wife Misty @TigerLilly11674.

**Mushiness Warning For those of you who do not want to bear witness to Spousal mushiness you can stop reading here for those that don’t care read on… Misty you don’t get a choice you have to read on so there:P **

Thank you for putting up with all my shit, all my faults and foibles, and thank you for being there to inspire me and loving me even when I’m a dumbass.  I love you with all my heart and I thank God every day for bringing you in my life, even on the days you piss me off, oddly enough especially on those days.

Back in Black….and white…

Okay Random Pimpage is about ready to start coming back to life, it’ll likely live up to it’s name to start and just be random postings until I can get everything back into some semblance of chaos I can work in… order just doesn’t work for me… sorry about the hiatus but I needed to get some things right in my life, and in my own headspace before I continued.

I still plan on doing the worthy causes segment, I still plan on doing 8 questions.  I think I’m going to do them the way I truly meant for them to be.  I ‘m also going to work up to ACTUALLY interviewing some people.  Eventually I plan on adding audio here and some segments may be moving to audio.  And of course I plan on doing random pimpage to give a people their due that are doing a hell of a job, not just in podio / blogoshphere but wherever I see it even in meatspace.

I may start going against my if you can’t say anything nice just shut your freaking trap policy that I have here on this blog and you might see some rants.

I still have obligations to get out of the way, just thought I’d throw out a heads up that I am not gone, I have not given up on blogging / podcasting / writing I just have to get the rest of my ducks in a column (I hate rows) so that I can actually do it all and not melt down, and not have them conflict with each other.  I have way to freaking many hobbies and really need to cut some out.

So in short I am not back yet.. but soon….

God Bless and have a blast, and as always take it lite.


Going Dark

There are some things I need to address in meatspace and while I’m addressing them my creative efforts will be taking a break.

Nobody is Ill or Injured, there is no major earth shattering issue that needs support from the community. – There are just some things I need to take care of for my family’s sake and my own so my energies are better focused there than finding media to review, or working on my own creative efforts.

Thanks for your understanding, and patience at this time.

I plan to return, just not sure when.

Tuesday’s Causes – Special Over Sized Edition

Once Again it’s time for Tuesday’s Cause –

There are still 2 VERY worthy causes here in our own online community that could still use your help they are the Legal Defense Fund to Help SVAllie with her legal costs from her custody battle to keep the EP (Her daughter the Elf Princess) with her and the Trust for Sonic Boom (SB is Tee Morris’s daughter and recently tragedy struck taking Tee’s Wife Natalie.)

Help out if you can if not with a few $$$ with some encouragement, prayer, or time.

But there are a lot of causes out there that we don’t see, children that need a transplant families effected by disaster, and nations effected by even larger disasters.   Take a moment today and pray or send positive thoughts / energy (whatever your “thing” is) and if you got a spare dime chip it in to help a cause, or better yet donate some time to help a cause along or even a shoulder or an ear to someone that is effected by a tragedy.

Double stuffed post here today as well.  Today I’d like to talk about Make A Wish Foundation, and Ronald McDonald House.

Sunday was the two year anniversary of my niece Sharon Marie Reed passing.  This time of year leaves the Asplund family a little fucked up.  This post is in memory of Share Bear Reed.

I’m a little teary because of thinking about the post that went up just before this one so this is gonna be a quick in out.

The Make a Wish Foundation is a very worthy cause helping terminal children’s wishes and dreams come true.  What more worthy cause can there be than to give hope, strength and joy to children with life-threatening medical conditions..  You don’t just have to throw money at the problem you can donate time and talent as well.

Make A Wish Foundation Website –

The Ronald McDonald House is a charity that helps families stay close to their children when they are hospitalized away from home.  It provided Sheila with a place to stay just blocks from Children’s memorial in case something happened she could remain close.  Their website can say it a lot better than I can.

Ronald McDonald House Website –

Screw it I’ll toss two more things out there – In Chicago it’s Children’s Memorial, in Indianapolis it’s Riley’s, and there is St. Jude’s for children with cancer, and there are many others out there that I don’t know of, but I know every so often local business will always sell boots eggs balloons, pumpkins, etc depending on the time of year to help out local children’s hospitals.  Find one close by do what you can for them.

Lastly this seems like a morbid thing to bring up, and as a parent I’m creeped the hell out by it but it’s still something that needs to be thought about.  Organ donation, not only by you but heaven please forbid our children.  Sharon was on a transplant list before she passed sadly her body was past the point of no return when a heart that matched became available.  Your gift could prevent someone else from going through the pain of losing a loved one.  I’m not saying you must donate your, or your kids organs because that decision is not the right one for everyone but think about it.  I mean if I expect someone to donate to save my life or my child’s, what right do I have to say no if the tables were reversed?

Donate Life America Website –

The Governments Organ and Tissue Donation Initiative –

Hit me up at with the Subject Tuesday Cause if you have a cause you want / need me to pimp.  There are plenty of people out there that need a hand, not just a hand out.  See who you can help today.